A Has Been..

After a disastrous exam with that multinational company, I was never been so humiliated in the elusive search for the perfect job. I admit that I slacked during my college years but I made sure that I did good in business school, for heaven’s sake, I was even a dean’s lister, garnering an average of 3.5 out of the perfect 4. Looking at my transcript of records from Ateneo, I only had one 2.5 and all of my grades were 3.5. I am so proud of myself.\

Anyway, I just decided to saw my goddaughter’s play, her “finals” for Repertory Philippines summer classes. They did a production of “Once Upon A Mattress”, a fairy tale musical that is somehow a predecessor of “Ever After”, “Shrek” and “Never After”. We grew up with our fairy tales ending in happy ever after, with damsel-in-distress waiting for her knight-in-shining-armor. Lately, we are being told that the princess is actually the one that will save the prince (Drew Barrymore in a reworking of “Cinderella” in “Ever After”), the ogre being a nice being and not someone who is nasty (“Shrek”) and other creative twists that challenge the Disney franchise of happy endings. I must admit, my goddaughter is really good, she’s only 7 and she aced her leading role that requires endless singing and dancing, and beat this, she can act. I can’t help but be proud and a little envious. It is my frustration to do stage, and when I say stage, the legitimate Broadway and West End musicals. I grew up without much exposure to Repertory when I was young, local actor’s guilds then were something of “elitist” and “high brow”. I did the next best thing after high school, to soak up to all the local productions of all straight plays and musicals. And when Lea Salonga was chosen as Kim and a host of other Filipinos as ensemble cast in Miss Saigon, I can’t help but wish I was one of them.

When local musicals started coming out, there were “Magsimula Ka”, “Magnificat”, “Larawan”, “Noli Me Tangere”, “El Filibusterismo” and even “Zsazsa Zaturnah”. Thanks to the musical geniuses like Ryan Cayabyab and other noteworthy composers, Pinoys added another feather to its cap. Watching them with an easy-to-grasp lyrics, these musicals are at par with what the foreign ones had to offer.

Going back to my goddaughter Kimmy, she’s a pro, to think she still has years ahead of her to formally train. I kidded my “kumare” as to where her daughter got her talent, to which she replied, “Of course, not from me!”, which brought the house down.

Kids nowadays are really amazing, and I can’t help but feel the gravity of age knocking on my door. Failing that exam I earlier took, years of smoking and other bad habits have finally caught up on me. It is a sad reality, that despite my experience, I can already say that I am on my way out, a “has been” who “never was” in the first place.